I suppose to bring clarity to my story I must talk about the building in which I work. The company I work for is housed on the top three floors of a restored 100+ year old hotel. Back in it's hay day it was said to have been a place of splendor and class. This of course was during the big boom of the coal industry in this area, and these little hick towns were, (for a short time at least) quite lucrative and brought about big business to this area. Long story short, this hotel was a place for the coal tycoons and such to party in the grand ballroom, enjoy fine dining and live the lifestyle they were used to. Forward to today and we have 6 floors of rented office space, and at ground level there is a fully restored and open lobby and mezzanine area with beautiful columns and grand ceilings and floors which is rented out to anyone with the cash. The local schools have their proms here, businesses have conferences, and dinners and such. The majority of the time though it is rented out for weddings by [mostly] upper class people for that ballroom atmosphere. It's safe to say that at least one event of some sort goes on here about once a week.
So...the norm for these events is a group of people typically show up the night or day before something is to occur and will decorate or otherwise prepare the lobby area for the "big day". Once "big day" arrives, we have to walk right through these events as they occur to get to the elevator. We're usually carrying bags of food from McD's or something similar, kickin' it in jeans and a t-shirt walking through crowds of onlookers in tuxedos and gowns eating catered food. I can't speak for my co-workers, but it leaves me feeling as if I'm sticking out like a steaming turd in the snow; just a tad out of place. Now, fully two paragraphs into this you may be asking yourself, "self...what the hell does this have to do with boundaries, and separation and such?" Well, in hindsight, I'm going out on a limb here and saying pretty much not a damn thing. But I have fully set the stage for something that took about five seconds to occur. Don't all four of you, my loyal followers, just love me?
Some sort of event is clearly happening tomorrow, (well, today now that it's 6am). I had went out to BK for food at around 9:30 pm and noticed some of the aforementioned upper class down in the lobby preparing the tables and such for whatever is going on. A nicely dressed middle aged gentleman and two ladies were working away, and were still working when I returned with the food for everyone about 20 minutes later. As I stepped out of the mezzanine close to where they were, a grand fart came upon me and was ready for launch. Trying to have a [rare] bout of decency I held my vile flatus until I rounded the corner and reached the elevator, well out of range of my upper class onlookers. As soon as I thought it safe I dropped my payload with an ass-warming brrrraaap, but just as I committed to the deed an odd thing occurred. At the exact same moment I "bombed Hiroshima" the upper class gentleman, (apparently patiently awaiting my departure) spewed out a thunderous belch that easily rivaled any cheap beer burp I have ever had the pleasure of hearing. 'Twas so loud in fact that it mostly covered the craponese conversation my arse was having with my pants. I just kinda cocked my head slightly like a confused dog, shrugged my shoulders and headed onto the elevator. I worked throughout the night and pondered the event until I could stand it no more and came here to share it with my steadfast followers, (aren't you glad you went all the way with this one?).
I should come up with some wonderfully elaborate "moral of the story" thing here, but I'm now off work and I wanna get the hell out of here. There's something amusing about this so come up with your own ending, I'm going home.
Me
Edit: Here are a couple of pictures that highlight the areas of the alleged "assult"
